I Made The Mistake

of crying in front of him last night. Yes, I am sad my relationship is coming to an end. This is several years of my life that I’m saying goodbye to. I had high hopes for us; I really believed we could make this work. So yes, it hurts and I want to cry. But that doesn’t mean I’m changing my mind. I am finally certain that no matter the good times we had, we are ruining each other staying together. 

He took it as an opportunity to get close to me and remind me that we should enjoy the little time we have left together. While I agree, I don’t agree to the extent that he is wanting. He wants us to spend the next couple of weeks hooking up; I have no desire for that. My physical attraction to him faded when the booze intake increased. Having sex with a drunk person is different because you can see in their eyes that they aren’t really there with you. Now when I move his hands away, he apologizes. Unfortunately, he continues his attempts…every half hour or so. It really opens my eyes up and tells me I made the right choice. 

Here is a man, no, a boy playing adult, that asks for confirmation that we are broken up yet finds it acceptable to keep trying to sleep with his now ex-girlfriend. Looking at the awkward situation, I guess it’s possible to misinterpret my motive to continue to live here after ending things but I have made it beyond clear that I am doing this as a favor for him. I do not want to be intimate, I just want us to enjoy time with the girls before we move on. So why, after making my intentions very clear, does he still try to get away with the touching and the obnoxious innuendos? Any other person would have broken it off and packed up and left the same night. But I am not cold or cruel, no matter how mistreated I am. 

He is going to make me regret my choice to stay and I will have no other option but to leave early.